a milestone

it's nearing the end of the first intake and we're all anticipating the posting results that will appear within the next two days. sometimes, it's a good thing to look back on what we've gone through as a class, thick or thin, through a two month period that kept our hearts together, no matter how far apart we thought we were the moment we were put into our classes. away from the comfort of our secondary school/past-jc friends in my case, we still set our minds to hold ourselves as one and make the best out of it.

two months sounds like a long time, but in my opinion this duration just shot through, and at the end we we're all wondering how it came and gone so much faster than we expected. to me these two months were a conglomerate of feelings--happiness, hyperactivity, sadness, disappointment, madness, jealousy ; whatever incidents might have induced in our minds. but at the end of the day, we're all grateful where we end up. life is never a bed of roses, and you never really understand the value of good if you don't experience the bad.

what i liked most about this period were the learning points i had. firstly, i realised that sometimes, it's important to give and take, to make compromises. i discovered that not everyone would react in the same way, or at least ways that are similar, to the same issue. it's sometimes better to look at situations from others' perspectives and think really hard--how would you feel if you were them? if you behave in a particular way, how would it appear to them given their mental ability and level of understanding of your feelings?

also, i felt that i was a tad too serious during these 2 months--probably cos of what i faced last year and that i have to press on no matter what. in this case i think i affected others quite badly on what the impression of first intake is, when apparently i was supposed to give them a welcoming and fun experience of the first intake in cjc.

what struck me was that although 1T05 was a really good start for me this year, there were still qualities of 1T25 that drew me away. i thought that 1T25 was a crap year in '06, but everyone was more caring, they'd ask out of concern why i'm feeling a particular way, and i really give it to them that they were able to see that i wasn't feeling good inside. the level of thinking and undersanding was there, but there was an air of sterility that didn't really give me a sense of belonging. it was one hell of a ride, a really emotionally-charged one.

however, i have to give credit to 1T05 also for teaching me the values of leading a class that is ever so spontaneous, loud, unpredictable and hyperactive. it was a "have fun so much you lose your troubles in your head" kind of thing and the level of teamwork and co-operation is undescribable, but i wished that the people could have been more understanding and sensitive about what they say. which is something we were strongly lacking in.

either way, i know that nothing is perfect and never will be, cos if everything were perfect, there wouldn't be such a thing as wonderful memories. sometimes, it's also in the bad things that make memories worthwhile and easier to miss. that is something i'll never deny.