life's like that

"i don't wanna be you, don't wanna be just like you."--the anthem, Good Charlotte

hmmm. it's amazing i get to write in my blog almost everyday for the past few days. i'm quite pissed at my computer actually. it's infected with spyware and even after removing 154 of them with ad-aware and spybot it still was. i feel like i'm fighting a losing war. i'm going to buy a new CPU, i hope. and no guys, no mac for me. no money. (:

in about 26 hours i'll be seeing my mum and my sis off to the airport where they'll join my dad in China. then the house will be mine! for two weeks that is. and i'm so looking forward to the class party i planned. it's really fun planning stuff for everyone. like the saying goes, it's better to give than to receive.

finally i get to see my dad soon cos after the two weeks i'll be leaving too! with my other sister and my aunt. heard the weather was blazing hot there, compared to the sub-zero ones last november. rats, i'll miss the good old cold weather where i'd soak in the bath with a heater blowing hot air on top of me. and a glass of hot milo before i turn in to bed. man, the life there rocks. i just don't like to stay there for too long.

life is kinda sad for everyone now. not so long ago i watched the last 28 contestants of singapore idol do their thing, and it was really emotional. especially the guy, what's his name, he said he wanted his mum to smile before she left this world. can't believe there are still so many caring sons. i don't ususally do such stuff but i felt what he had to go through, so i went to my room, turned up the amp and played "wake me up when september ends" as a song dedication although he wouldn't be able to hear it. sounded really nice. i have no idea why my guitar sounds its best when i feel down, even though the strings are rusty.

speaking of life--remember everyone, life here is temporary. when you die, it may be the end of your BODY, but it will not be the end of YOU. you will STILL exist. in a much better place called HEAVEN. where everything is going to be so much better. never think of what heaven would be like, or you'll start comparing life here to there. and you'll never know until you get there. just know that it'll be PARADISE. in the meantime, just enjoy your life on earth while you can. it's a preparation before you get to heaven. make the most of your day. jump at every chance and live it to the fullest! the last thing you will want is to regret you didn't do what you wanted.

in life, the friends you have are like a train ride. at stations where the train stops, people will get on and others will get off. when the train reaches the end, those who remain are friends you keep for life. sometimes you just want to push people off the train, but ultimately if they are meant to stay, they will. as for me, having a fair share of people walking off the train especially in not a particularly friendly way. ultimately, what i can say now is i have both a person i'm trying to throw off and a person i'm trying to pull on in my life. ahh, the dilemma.

man, i just love the friends i have. i can actually predict which ones of them will alight at the stations, but i'll keep my doors open 24/7, welcoming anyone with open arms. some people have made such great impacts in my life so far, i wanna thank them so much.



*yvonne: for always lending a listening ear, for knowing when i feel down and consoling me, for the times where you couldn't speak out in class and used the GC to "message" me, for adding so much laughter to the dull class life to brighten up my day, for bringing me so much closer to God, understanding what i am going through and giving me the ultimate advice that is both reasonable and do-able, and for the countless support. i guess you're just meant to remain on the train for the rest of the ride (:


*sean:for always taking the effort to go hang out with me, making lawn bowling seem so much more fun, giving funny suggestions about everything you see just like i do, being the first person i talked to when we were divided into classes. really appreciate it, man. basically i'll miss out on so much if you weren't around.

tarun, me and sean: the 3 brothers after PE lesson walking to novena. (:

*tarun:i'll never forget the times we had with sean as well, my friend for 5 years! (: for teaching me so many useful everyday tamil phrases, taking so much pride in doing whatever you do, especially for the class. the one who has the best outlook on art and design. i'll look for you if i need a designer for my house next time!

*dinesh:for the music we love, for lending me so much of your time and giving me so much rational explanations on life. for giving me the best suggestions in everything i ask, and crapping about the everyday items we see. so much fun with you around. looking forward to so much more. lawn bowling will be so much fun too! (:

*carys:for knowing when i'm unhappy as well, taking notice of what i'm going through. and having a great tolerance level of whatever i throw at you. :D for trying so hard to bring the project work group together even though i didn't do much. thanks a lot, girl! i owe you one.

*xiang yang:for the great comic relief in class, for lending me your PSP during breaks and teaching me the wonderful violence of GTA xD, for filming the wonderful 1T25 music video and forever beating stanley using your retarded kungfu skills. what a HTC, so vibrant and sporting. i can't imagine myself doing such things. keep it up nonetheless man! it's nice.

*sherilyn:i'd like to extend my thanks to you, for ultimately teaching me how to be optimistic. just by knowing you has brought me so many things to learn about life, and changing my outlook for the better. i can't imagine if i didn't know you in the first place--how i would cope. thanks for always being there and being so cheerful. although we're not together anymore, i'll still cherish all that i've had. sorry if i did make you unhappy. i hope to see you through life all the way. i love you! will you mind being the one for me to invite on board the train?

as for the person who i'm trying to get off the train, i just wanna say it in the form of lyrics of a song.

"it's alright to tell me
what you think about me
i won't try to argue
or hold it against you

i know that you're leaving
you must have your reasons
this season is calling
your pictures are falling down

the steps that i retrace
the sad look on your face
the timing and structure
did you hear he fucked her?

a day late, a buck short
i'm writing the report
on losing and failing
when i move i'm flailing now

and it's happened once again
i'll turn to a friend
someone who understands
sees through the master plan

but everybody's gone
and i've been here for too long
to face this on my own
well i guess this is growing up.

and maybe i'll see you
at a movie sneak preview
you show up and walk by
on the arm of that guy
and i'll smile and you'll wave
we'll pretend it's okay
the charade, it won't last
when he's gone, i won't come back."

dammit--blink-182


ahh, friends. what could i do without them? thanks to God for giving them to me.

have you ever tried jumping with a guitar like in all those MTVs? well many of them are actually quite undo-able especially while holding the chord. looks nice but actually very hard to pull off. i only realised i could do that for a couple of songs especially those that require the drop-d tuning of the 6th string and i just barr the whole powerchord. songs like that whould include "Sugar, We're Going Down" and "Dance, Dance" by Fall Out Boy, a few Green Day hits like "Letterbomb" and "Whatsername", and probably Blink-182's "All the Small Things". many people think i'm mainstream listener but i'm actually not. i love Green Day and i want to own all of their albums ever made in history, especially the older ones. that's what you call real rock. i might as well compile a list of all my favourite songs now:

=Green Day=
-letterbomb
-whatsername
-redundant
-homecoming
-uptight
-last ride in (this one is instrumental, hawaiian-surf style music)
-prosthetic head
-church on sunday (yeah!)
-waiting


notice most of them are from the older albums (:

oh well. i guess life's like that. all the small little things in life, depends on whether you want to look at them. if you take pride in whatever you do, these small little things will seem very significant. really worth it.


thank you so much God!